Experiments Are Always Fun
by hahacanyounot
Summary: Shinra and Celty have just had it with Izaya and Shizuo's fights, so they decide to take things into their own hands and do a little experiment.


Attempting a one-shot. . . Yeah probably failed but oh well XD

* * *

Celty and Shinra were having a normal daily conversation when Shinra brought up his new plan for Shizuo and Izaya. He explained it to Celty and she was quite suspicious of it at first.

_'Are__ you sure it will work?' _The dullahan typed on her phone and held it up for Shinra to see. He rubbed his chin thoughtfully and sighed.

"To be honest, I'm not sure. It's worth a try though, right? I mean maybe if they just have a civil conversation they can realize that they don't really hate each other. Then they can stop tearing up the town and frightening innocent people." The doctor said while smiling slightly. "Could you imagine how incredible things would be then?"

_'I suppose you're right, but what will we do if something goes horribly wrong?'_

"We'll just have to wing it because honestly, I have no clue. But I do have some faith in both of them, so. . ." He trailed off as he stood up to stretch. Really tough, didn't know what to do if things took a turn for the worst. Lord knows the city isn't big enough for the two of them, so how crazy is it for him to expect one room to be big enough for the both of them. He pushed those thoughts out of his mind and grinned and walked over to grab his phone, and he started dialing Shizuo's number first.

"Now, lets call them shall we?"

. . .

Shizuo had just gotten out of work and he was sitting outside on a park bench smoking his cigarette and enjoying the overall peacefulness of the day. He figured that today was such a perfect and tranquil day, nothing would go wrong and it could never be ruined.

Life just loves to kick him in the ass, doesn't it? Just then his phone began ringing and it was Shinra and he said there was something important that they had to discuss and he would like him to come over as soon as he could, as long as it was no inconvenience to him.

"Yeah, no problem. I'll be over soon." The blonde said as he hung up his phone and took one long drag of his cigarette before he put it out and started on his way to Shinra's place. He was really curious as to why Shinra insisted that he had to be there so soon and why there was something so important waiting for him.

_'It better not have anything to do with him hooking me up with some random person and it better not be associated at all with the Flea.' _Shizuo though. He was growing more anxious by the second, so he pulled out another cigarette to calm his nerves.

. . .

Izaya just got back from taking a walk and observing everyone around him. He found it relaxing and very interesting to observe and learn about every human out there. He was fascinated by them and he loved information and feeling empowered by knowing it all.

He sat down in his chair and started spinning, he also started planning what would be on his agenda for tomorrow. Then his phone started ringing. He quickly answered it.

"Yes, Shinra?"

"Um, I'm going to need you to come here as soon as possible. You aren't busy or anything are you?"

"No, I'm not busy. Why do you need me to come over?" Izaya asked growing suspicious. "This doesn't have anything to do with Shizu-chan, does it? Although it would be quite ironic if it did because. . ." Izaya went on about theories and predictions and what not.

"Haha, no. Of course this has _nothing to do with Shizuo_. I just have to show you something important."

"Alright, I'll be there soon." He replied before hanging up.

He knew Shizuo was going to be there. Just by the way Shinra awkwardly handled his response, he knew that his beloved monster was going to be there also. But why would he invite them both over? He knew they were both bound to destroy everything in their paths when they were together, so why?

The of informant sighed and began on his way over to Shinra's.

It didn't take him too long to get there, he supposed, he even stopped to get some sushi but it still didn't take him long to arrive. He knocked on Shinra's door and waited for him to answer it. He heard a muffled, "Shinra! Someones at your door, you should probably answer it!" He grinned, his prediction was correct, Shizuo was here.

Shinra opened the door with a smile on his face. "Come in, come in, Izaya."

"What? Who's here- Flea! What are you doing here?! Go away, Shinra invited me over, not you!" The blonde said while standing up and angrily walking towards the informant. Shinra stepped in front of him before Shizuo could do any damage.

"Actually, Shizuo, I've been expecting him as well, and frankly if you guys kill each other before I get to do my experiment, how will I be able to get accurate results if you're both dead?"

"Not my problem! And wait, you invited us over here for an experiment? That's just great." Shizuo said sarcastically while sitting down on the couch and flexing his fists trying to calm down before he broke something in his friend's home.

"Okay, so if you two will just follow me we can start the experiment." Shinra said while walking away and motioning for them to follow. They both managed to do what he asked without getting into a fight. They walked into a dark room and soon enough Shinra turned on the light.

"What exactly does this _experiment _of yours entail?" Izaya asked coolly.

" It's a surprise. Can you both close your eyes for me?" The doctor asked. Again, they both did what they were asked and then they felt something cold, hard, and tight wrap around their wrists. Their eyes shot open and Izaya whimpered.

"Handcuffs, really? Please do explain why you handcuffed me to _this idiot._" Izaya said while trying to slide his wrist out of it.

"Oh really? _I'm the idiot?" _Shizuo asked and then sneered. "Yeah, okay Flea. You're always going on about being able to understand everyone and saying humans are so predictable so if they are, how come you listened to Shinra when he told you to close your eyes? Isn't that like a big no-no for you?"

"Oh shut up! Stop acting like you know me, Shizu-chan!"

"The reason why you two are handcuffed together is because you seriously need to cut the crap and just _talk to each other._ Maybe if you have a normal conversation and like discuss your feelings or something, you can understand each other better and not feel the urge to piss each other off and wreck the whole damn city in the process." Shinra said. "Also, you aren't getting unhancuffed until you two learn how to behave in the same room together."

They both groaned in response to this and Shinra glanced at them once before saying, "Izaya, please don't try to aggravate Shizuo. And Shizuo, if he does, please try to control yourself." He then walked out the door and walked over to his laptop where he was recording full audio and video of them in the room.

"Ugh, I can't believe I'm stuck here with you of all people. This is so disgusting." Izaya said with disgust and glowered at the blonde who was currently cuffed to him.

"Didn't you hear what he just said? He said to not piss me off!" Shizuo yelled while balling his hands into fists and growling. "I hate violence, but when it comes to you, Flea, it seems like that's my only option!"

Shinra's voice came over a loudspeaker in the room. "Calm down."

Shizuo let his head hang down and he closed his eyes trying to pretend he wasn't stuck here in a _very small _room with the man he hated the most in the entire world, let alone being so close to him and being literally attached to him.

"Come on let's get up, Shizu-chan. My legs are starting to cramp up." The informant said while trying to stand up. He got no response from the other male in the room. "Can't you just get up and let me stretch?" Izaya tried to drag Shizuo off of the floor but of course, failed miserably. Izaya yanked really hard on the handcuffs and ended up hurting his wrist in the process, but he also lost his balance from tugging so hard on the solid unmoving object plopped on the floor, and he fell right onto Shizuo's lap.

Just then the lights turned out.

"Uh. . . Well, this is awkward."

"Really, Flea? That's all you've got to say to this? Get off of me!" Shizuo bellowed and pushed Izaya off of him really hard, but forgetting that they're handcuffed together the momentum of Izaya falling backwards tugged on his wrist and he landed right on top of the man he calls Flea.

"Shinra! Why did you turn the lights out? We can't see a damn thing!" Shizuo yelled while frantically looking around hoping to be able to magically see in the dark.

Izaya moaned from the intense pain he was feeling coursing through his head and spreading throughout his body. He grabbed the back of his head and realized it did feel slightly wet. He brought his hand close to his face and licked his finger to confirm his thoughts of the liquid being blood.

"Shizu-chan. . ."

"I told you not to call me that!"

"Yeah, but we have a problem. My head is kind of bleeding, heheh." Izaya kept touching the back of his head to make sure he wasn't hallucinating it or anything.

"Seriously?"

"No, Shizu-chan. I'm lying to you." The informant said sarcastically.

"Oh, well Flea you need to cut that shit out. I'm getting real sick of it and I'm sure everyone else is too."

"Oh my god have you never heard of sarcasm? Of course my head really is bleeding you barbaric twit!"

"I don't believe you." Shizuo stated in an odd tone, and he pouted a little, although he knew it didn't matter what kind of faces he made because they were in complete darkness. He was just acting curious because he wanted to finally have the Flea to himself. He would finally be able to wrap his fingers around Izaya's neck and squeeze the life out of him.

"Well fine then, feel for yourself. Just please be gentle. I'm really not in the mood for having my skull smashed in today." Izaya groped around for Shizuo's hand, but came into contact with his chest instead. He left his hand lie there for a minute, gently feeling the monster's rapid heart beat.

"Yeah, yeah, well if you really want me to help or whatever I gotta find your head first so wait." Shizuo said while reaching his hand out and softly and slowly searching for Izaya's face. Suddenly he made contact with something soft and warm. "Okay so, uh, I found your face."

"No shit, Shizu-chan."

The blonde moved his hand a little and one of his fingers brushed over Izaya's lips. _"Well I really hope this doesn't make me sound insane or anything but his lips feel really really soft, softer than I expected them to be, I mean, well, not like I ever imagined what his lips would feel like, heh. . ." _

"Uhh, Sh-Shizu-chan?" Izaya stuttered while trying to figure out a witty response. _"What is he doing? Why did he just touch my lips? Why isn't he trying to at least believe that my head is bleeding?"_

"I really hate you, Shizu-chan."

_No response._

"Hellooooo, Shizu-ch-" Izaya was cut off by the feeling of Shizuo's fingers being placed on his lips again and them being gently touched. The gentle movements made him relaxed and slightly dazed. It felt nice. Even though it was fun to piss off the monster and get a V.I.P. look at the incredible strength Shizuo possessed, it was also just as enjoyable to sit here and feel intimate with him.

_"Wait. INTIMATE?!" _Izaya quickly snapped back into reality and growled at Shizuo.

"What the hell are you doing?" Izaya asked. His heart was starting to beat faster and he wasn't sure if it was because he was oddly nervous or because of his quickly growing anger at being ignored. "I hate being ignored, dammit, answer me you fucking barbaric idiot!"

"What? Oh, sorry." Shizuo gently pulled his hand away and rested them on his legs.

"Why were you touching me like that? Isn't that just a little too intimate for you?" He asked in a mocking tone.

"Intimate?" The blonde asked very calmly and slightly confused. _"Was I seriously just being intimate with the Flea? . . . Yeah. I guess I was." _

"I don't really know. . . Anyways, how does your head feel? Does it still hurt?"

"No, it's fine now! But you know, this is one of the reasons why I hate you so much! You're so damn unpredictable! Why can't you just be like every other human out there? Why do you have to be so. . . so _you_? I'm constantly stressing over you because I just can't figure you out!" Izaya shouted and sounded completely distraught. He was completely losing his shit.

"Izaya. . ."

"Just shut up!"

_"Did he just use my real name in a calm tone? What's with him?!" _The informant thought to himself.

"To be honest, I don't think I hate you. . . Even after all you've done to me, I'm pretty sure I don't hate you."

"No! Shizuo! What are you saying? We're supposed to be enemies! We need to be enemies!"

"Izaya, we don't need to be enemies. I don't really want to be your enemy any more. . . Sorry."

"But. . . If we aren't enemies, then what will we be? Don't tell me you're giving up on me too. . . And did you just fucking apologize? What's gotten into you?"

"No, no. I-I was thinking something more along the lines of friends. Is that alright with you?" Shizuo questioned and smiled, even though the informant wouldn't be able to see him in the pitch black darkness of the window-less room.

"Friends? Hah, that's rich. Why would I ever want to be friends with y-"

"Oh shut up! I'm trying to be nice here and be the bigger person by ending our destructive chases and fights through the city! All it does it wear me out and I get so stressed because of them! Besides, we've never really tried being friends. Ever since day one it was always fights."

"Whatever."

"So . . . Friends then?" Shizuo asked in a more relaxed tone this time and gently touched Izaya's hand.

"Nope."

"Wh-" Whatever Shizuo was going to say was soon forgotten as the lips of his former archenemy were pressed against his own. He wasn't sure what he should do, he completely blanked out. He never really was good at kissing. . .

After ten seconds he had to pull away to take a deep breath.

"Don't tell me you forgot to breathe. . ." Izaya said with a hint of laughter behind it.

"Shut up!"

"Make me." Shizuo felt like that phrase was the number one thing to say to create sexual tension. Izaya wrapped his free arm around Shizuo's neck kissed him again. The blonde slid his un-cuffed arm down Izaya's thin frame wanting to feel every single inch of his body. He kept sliding his free hand down until he reached his thighs. He briefly broke the kiss to pick him up and automatically the informant wrapped his legs tightly around Shizuo's waist. Shizuo moved in to kiss Izaya again moving his lips very sloppily considering he wasn't very advanced with these things, but also in a heated and needy manner that made their lips shape together perfectly.

Izaya kissed back with just as much force, if not more, until both of them were breathless and blushing deeply, although that didn't really matter right now. All that mattered was the fact that Shizuo's lips left Izaya's own and traveled down to where they were now kissing and sucking and licking the soft skin of his neck.

The informant really didn't mean to let that small whimper out, but he did and for once he knew how Shizuo was feeling - arrogant and satisfied with himself. He didn't approve of the monster feeling that way, but _damn _his mouth felt so good.

Izaya could've died right then and there when Shizuo stopped what he was doing.

"Shizu-chan, what are you doing? Why did you. . . Stop?"

"I wanna sit down. You got a problem with that?" He asked in a cheeky tone. He plopped Izaya down on his lap and continued to tenderly nip and suck at the pale flesh on the informant's neck.

When Shizuo gently squeezed his butt, he just couldn't stand it anymore. He arched into Shizuo and started roughly grinding into him until they were both moaning and panting heavily.

Just then Shinra flung the door open and turned on the light. "Your punishment-slash-experiment is over now!"

He burst out laughing and rushed over to them to take the handcuffs off.

"Hurry up, Shinra! We don't have all day!" Izaya yelled before the handcuffs were unlocked and he made a mad dash for Shinra's door while Shizuo was just sitting there in awe.

"W-Wait! Flea, where are you going?"

"We gotta finish what we started, don't we?" Izaya started running and screamed back while winking, "I hope you'll be able to keep up!"

The blonde smirked and started chasing after Izaya. He smiled, he genuinely smiled because this time that he was chasing the Flea - his Flea - it wasn't out of anger or embarrassment or hatred, it was out of excitement and happiness. He could not have ever asked for a more eventful, life-changing but thrilling and happy day in his entire life.

* * *

**SO THE AWKWARD AND INEXPERIENCED WRITER STRIKES AGAIN! **

Hehe. . . So this was my first attempt at a Shizaya fic. I hope you all liked it :D Hope I didn't disappoint anyone.

Also, I'm pretty sure my mom read this when she looked at my laptop while I was in the bathroom. I walked out and when I looked over at her she just looked at me like, 'What the hell?'

It was almost as awkward as when my mom asked me what hard yaoi is.

Please review! Tell me how I did or what you thought of it!

Have a nice day, everyone c:


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